By Dan Holdhusen, Grandfather of three graduates and one currently enrolled in Blue Valley High School

More than thirty dads from throughout the Kansas City metro joined in a Chapter Chair Summit recently. The event marked the first-of-its-kind for leaders – both current and incoming in their positions – of the various Father’s Club chapters in the expanding footprint in the Father’s Club vision of “…creating simple ways for dads to be intentional with their KIDS, with other DADS and within their COMMUNITY.”

After a hearty meal, chapter leaders were welcomed and thanked by Mike Davisson, Executive Director, who led the group in reporting on a host of topics to update leaders on the latest programmatic, partnership efforts, best practices, upcoming events, and myriads of other subjects of interest to the enthusiastic attendees.

Father’s Club Board Member Share

Speakers also included Board members Todd Milner, Randy Bratton, and Brad Holdhusen.

Todd spoke about the ongoing effort that he leads to educate and inform dads in the area of Mental Health and Wellness. He explained that the schedule for upcoming workshops will be distributed sometime in August in advance of the upcoming school year. He explained briefly about the content of the course and indicated that over one hundred dads attended the sessions in the first half of this year and reviews were outstanding. One participant’s reaction: “Knowing what is offered at these workshops will, simply and literally, save lives!”

Bratton, who has been a main organizer of the Father’s Club’s largest single fundraiser during the year, the Mission Cup Golf Tourney, discussed plans for the upcoming events later this summer and fall. He explained that, for the first year, two dates are offered – one on Sept. 6^th and the second on Aug. 29^th, played on two separate courses. He encouraged attendees to promote the event, spread the word, and participate by organizing a team to participate.

Brad Holdhusen discussed the importance of having an “onboarding” process for the incoming chapter leaders, as well as stressed the importance of having dad leaders who lead by example to inspire other fathers in their chapters to be active participants in promoting and conducting events. He also encouraged leaders to begin planning events and their activities and recruitment of new members and volunteers for the upcoming school year now, before the school term begins in the fall.

Chapter Leader Testimonials

Although reports and overviews from Mike and the Father’s Club Board members were helpful and enlightening, the greatest part of the Chapter Chair Summit came from the experiences and insights of those who led Chapters during the 2023-2024 school year just concluded.

Example of these testimonials included:

• The incredible sense of support and community that came from the dads and the Father’s Club organization after a tragic incident that occurred during the school year involving the death of family members. The comfort offered by the intentional action led by Father’s Club members contributed to healing and a feeling of security for affected students and faculty that were deeply affected by the tragedy;
• The success and associated benefits of one chapter’s efforts to sell concessions for home football games that not only contributed to a closeness within and among the entire community of students, staff, parents, and family members, but also enabled the chapter to provide some amazing Father’s Club-sponsored events during the school year. A capstone of this Chapter’s efforts resulted in awarding $7,500 in scholarships to worthy students at the conclusion of the year;
• The alignment of partnerships with various local vendors in achieving very favorable prices (or, in some cases, donated goodies) to conduct dozens of Father’s Club’s signature events called “Fist Bumps for Food” (aka FB4F) during the school year by a growing number of chapters. A number of Summit-attendee dads could not say enough about how the thousands of kids who received a snack and a fist bump (or hug) from a dad before their classes had contributed to huge smiles and “thank yous” from the kids, not to mention the hearts of gratitude created on the part of the fathers.

Take-Aways from the Summit

The coming together of Father’s Club Chapter Chairs and other leaders accumulated a number of benefits. Everyone came away from the gathering with a sense of increased gratitude for the mission and activities of Father’s Club; but also, a renewed sense of appreciation of how the mission is playing out in the metro for the great good of KIDS, DADS, and the COMMUNITY.

Some high-level take-aways from the time together included:

• Relationships are key to a successful Chapter. Especially between Chapter leadership, superintendents, principals, and teachers;
• Be innovative with ideas on how to promote Father’s Club activities and events, but do not be afraid to copy another Chapter’s successful experiences;
• The Father’s Club has particular leadership expectations and ethical standards across the organization; but each Chapter is unique and encouraged to plan and conduct events that will “fit” for their individual Chapter;
• Investing a few dollars and, most importantly, time, into the life of a student pays exceptionally large and long-lasting rewards. For not only the KIDS, but also for DADS and the COMMUNITY.

Davisson concluded the meeting by thanking all attendees and pledged to support the leaders as they lead by example in their respective chapters and communities.

Spreading the Word

Recently, Mike Davisson, the Executive Director for Father’s Club, presented at The Entrepreneurs Alliance of Kansas City. This was a great opportunity to spread the word about the impact Father’s Club is having on high schools and middle schools in the greater Kansas City metro.

We would like to thank Doug Hubler with Apex Business Advisors for hosting this event!

The Entrepreneurs Alliance is exactly what it sounds like – a group of entrepreneurs and professionals who enjoy speaking into and supporting the process and ideas behind building successful businesses. Their goal is to connect and educate within the entrepreneurial ecosystem in and around Kansas City.

Mike began with a history of Father’s Club. How it began in 2018 and how it has grown every year since. There are Father’s Club chapters at 21 high schools and 4 middle schools… and the 2025 school year is bringing massive growth! (But we don’t want to ruin the surprise… more on that to come in future blog posts as we gear up for the new school year.)

Lead Courageously – We strive to be strong, courageous and to get involved. We are not afraid or discouraged when we have the body of men to support us.

One of the important pillars of Father’s Club is to lead courageously.

Mike delivered on the goal of leading courageously at this event. He is fairly new in his role as Executive Director and has only had the opportunity to do a handful of presentations about Father’s Club around Kansas City.

He began with an incredibly personal story that he got emotional about sharing, and most of the people in the room followed suit. Then he got into the power of Father’s Club for sharpening men and the impact Father’s Club is having in the lives of kids. Quite a few people in the room had heard of Father’s Club, which is a testimony to the growth in our community.

Members of the Entrepreneurs Alliance are active in Father’s Club chapters and have hosted various fundraising events that benefit Father’s Club. (A perfect example was the Porsches and Pancakes event.)

It was a great event followed by a good amount of Q&A. You can always tell by the questions asked in a Question and Answer session how interesting the topic was for the audience. The story of Father’s Club definitely hit the hearts of people attending based on their questions!

If you would like to have Father’s Club come and present to your company or organization, please let us know. Father’s Club began as a grass roots effort and word of mouth continues to accelerate involvement. The more we tell the story, the more fathers will want to get involved!

By Jim Bradford, Chapter Co-Chair at Mission Trail Middle School for Father’s Club

School’s out! Just in time, right?

The cold winter afternoons seem like a lifetime ago and those brisk spring mornings are suddenly a memory. In their place are warm evenings, staying up late and sleeping in.

Summer is here and all these kids certainly deserve a break. So do we, honestly, but summer is really about the little ones.

While the immediate thoughts turn to a seemingly endless summer of fun on the gaming console of choice or the rotating door of sleepovers, it’s important to remember the true gift that we’re handed when school is out – time.

It’s the most valuable of our commodities and we shouldn’t waste it.

Take time to make time. Summer is built for just that.

Ready for some harsh truths? As parents of middle schoolers, we are guaranteed around six or seven summers before those kiddos are off to college. As parents of high schoolers, it’s even more eye-popping as we have anywhere from one to three. Let that sink in. Depending on what grade your kiddo is in, you have anywhere from one to seven chances to bask in the summer sun with them before they are off to college. And then summers will look a lot different.

So, as we settle into summertime, it’s a good time to make some memories. Between fastballs and grounders, let’s soak up some sun poolside. When you’re not killing time between softball games, catch some fireflies at dusk.

OK, it’s more than Norman Rockwell summer fun, sure.

It’s a time for trips to the lake, fishing from the docks, learning to waterski. Or for those heading to the coast down south, it’s all about the beach.

While connecting with students through all of our efforts at the middle school and high school level is great, summer is for connecting with those that matter most.

Let’s make the summer of 2024 be all about family, friends and the Fourth of July.

And while your at it, see if any of those friends might be interested in joining Father’s Club, huh?

By Todd Milner, Director of Mental Health and Wellness/Board Member for Father’s Club

Father’s Day is this weekend! Saturday, June 16th. Of course we had to write about it. :)

Father’s Day was created in 1910 to celebrate and honor the importance that a father plays in being the leader and protector of his family. This day was designed and dedicated to all the fathers who stand as a pillar for their family members. Father’s Day is a day to show our love and gratitude to our fathers and make them feel special!

Fun facts:

• According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the necktie is the most popular of all Father’s Day gifts. (We can do better kiddos!)
• The first unofficial Father’s Day was celebrated on June 19, 1910.
• President Lyndon Johnson endorsed the nationwide commemoration of Father’s Day on the third Sunday of June in 1966.
• President Nixon officially declared Father’s Day a national holiday in 1972.
• The origin of the word dad may simply be baby talk – “dada” meaning ‘Father’.
• There are 1.5 billion fathers worldwide.
• Father’s Day is the fifth-largest card-sending occasion in America with almost 100 million Father’s Day cards sent each year.
• Only 50% of all Father’s Day cards are purchased for dads.

While many fathers get to hear, “Thank you for being there every day with just the love and guidance I’ve needed. Everything you’ve taught me has stuck with me and I’m lucky to have a dad like you.” “Dad, you have given me the best things in life: Your time, your care, and your love. I am truly grateful to have you in my life.” Sadly, there many fathers who experience sadness, loneliness and depression due to a loss of a child, a loss of their own father or they find themselves living in a split family. These events or “fence posts” are present and painful in many men’s lives, making it hard to celebrate or be celebrated on this day.

A father cares for his family unconditionally.

A father shows his children the way they should go in this world. He protects and works hard for his family. He sets a good example and makes sure his family doesn’t go without — even if he does. A father wears many hats in the life of his family: provider, protector, leader, teacher, helper, encourager, and friend.

A Father is a protector, teacher and encourager; he picks you up when you fall, he brushes you off and lets you try again; he is often referred to as a son’s first hero and daughter’s first love.

What does a daughter need from her father?

• Transparency
• Be a Good Example
• Share your Passions
• Unconditional Love
• Loving Imperfections
• Patience
• Support
• Reassurance

A daughter needs her dad to be transparent and honest with her. He needs to be an example of a good and loving husband, a great friend, a community member, a worker, a parent, and a “real” person. Why? Your daughter is going to model all of the future men in her life after her father, including the man she’s going to end up marrying. So, you want her to have high standards, and those standards are modeled after her dad!

She also needs you to share your passions and mistakes with her. She doesn’t need someone who has lived their life perfectly, rather someone that encourages a life of integrity. Being real with her is a vital part of building a strong and healthy relationship with your daughter as she grows to become an adult. She needs to see and know the “real you” who makes mistakes and has flaws.

Daughters need unconditional love. They need to know that no matter how much they mess up that their dad will always be there for them and love them unconditionally! Daughters need love, patience, honesty, encouragement, a good listening ears and a shoulder to cry on.

As a daughter grows up, she will undoubtedly make many mistakes. Having a father that is constantly reassuring that he’s proud of her no matter what she does is critical to her development as a young lady! No matter how busy your life gets, taking time to sit down and do something like chatting on the phone, playing a game of cards, going on a drive, just listening are so important in always reassuring her that she is loved, seen and you are proud of her. Our daughters need quality time with the man they will model their relationships after, their fathers!

What does a son need from his father?

• Role Model
• Forgiveness
• Discipline
• Teacher
• Unconditional Love
• Strength
• Respect
• Integrity & honesty

A son needs many of the same things as a daughter does but most importantly a son is looking to his father to be a role model. He needs a teacher and a strong male figure in his life that provides visual examples of what it means to be a strong man of integrity!  He needs someone to look up to and someone to model his life after. He needs a man who can show him how to be a gentleman.  He needs his father to show him what respect and honesty looks like. He needs his dad to show him how to value and respect women.  He needs to see from his father an example of how to love his future wife unconditionally.

A son needs his father to understand when he makes a mistake how to use those times as a learning opportunity knowing his dad once walked in similar shoes.  He wants a dad who no matter what will have his back and will love him unconditionally. A son needs his fathers to be present and engaged consistently in his life to celebrate mountain top experiences and/or help him navigate through tough times.

Sons need their fathers to be men of character that they can look up to and see great examples of what it means to be a man. They need to learn discipline and humility from their fathers. They need to know that no matter what happens or what they do that they can always come to their fathers and talk it out without judgement.  Our sons need quality time with the man they will model their life after!

Fathers these are very long & demanding lists from our sons and daughters! The great news is that all this hard work, sleepless nights and tears shed will be repaid by the joy you will get in seeing your sons and daughters thrive and live a life they learned from talking and watching you!  There is no more important job in this world than to be an engaged, intentional, passionate and loving father!

Happy Father’s dads!  You got this!

By Dan Holdhusen, Grandfather of three graduates and one currently enrolled in Blue Valley High School

Since the COVID year of 2020, the Father’s Club has annually awarded one recipient its prestigious Shovel Award. This year’s recipient, Clay Norkey, has acted diligently and faithfully in a variety of leadership roles for Blue Valley West Father’s Club over the course of the last several years. The award was presented at a special gathering of the Blue Valley West dads and special guests – including Clay’s wife, Sherri, his parents, and two of his nine children – on May 14, 2024, by Brad Holdhusen, Father’s Club Founder and President. This article includes a video of the presentation in which Holdhusen describes the genesis of and meaning behind the Shovel Award and offers high praise to Clay and his leadership in Father’s Club.

Blue Valley West was the third chapter since the inception of the Father’s Club in 2019, and Clay has been its leader from the beginning. With his last (of nine!) children graduating from West High School this year, he has decided to step aside at the end of this school year. He will be replaced by Kevin Sayland who has been among the core of leaders that are part of the amazing dads at West.

Amazing things happening at Blue Valley West

One of the several testimonies to the amazing things the BVW Father’s Club has done was chronicled in an earlier blog. For the past four years, dads have headed up the concession sales for Blue Valley West’s home football games. This activity provides some of the funding that is then used to organize and host events throughout the year at West, which include a litany of creative events that are organized and carried out by Father’s Club dads. Clay has led the planning and conducting of these myriads of activities that have earned the affection of students, teachers, administrators, and others involved in the life of the campus.

Saylan, Danny Mayer and Dan Viall constitute the core of leadership that makes things happen at BV West. They and many other fathers have become involved supporters and doers in serving and contributing to the enthusiasm and richness of the life and culture of the school. Like Clay, each of these dads has a title or role in serving in the Father’s Club mission. But they would all quickly say that they cannot do what they do without Clay’s inspiring and dynamic leadership that creates community. That leadership is how things get done.

Consider some of the activities the Father’s Club conducts during the school year that contribute to the quality of life and positive relationships on West’s campus. Besides the concession activities in the fall, the group also leads and participates in:

• Spring Prom activities;
• School Assemblies;
• Senior Movie Night;
• Hosting a Wild Way Coffee event for teachers;
• Jaguar Grill to provide lunch to students and teachers;
• Fist Bumps for Food (FB4F) events;
• Senior Sunset…and the list goes on.

Clay Norkey’s Impact

In many ways, Clay Norkey’s fingerprints appear on all of these activities. Most notably, you will find him with sleeves rolled up to be an integral part of each event. As if his life wasn’t already busy enough with being a dad for nine children, practicing law, and serving on the Blue Valley School Board, according to Saylan, Clay continually practices the Father’s Club mantra of “#Justshowup”, which, of course, provides inspiration for so many West dads to be part of what’s going on at the school.

This statement from Dan Viall captures the essence of the character and leadership of Norkey: “A lot of people know him as a chapter lead and civic leader, but very few know how much time and effort he spends doing tireless and thankless work behind the scenes…” Danny Mayer adds that “Clay is a staple inside (BVW Father’s club). He’s always present and available to help and engage with dads, faculty, and students.” Kevin Saylan praises Clay’s value to the organization with this statement: “Clay is and was the backbone of BVW Father’s Club. His leadership, energy, and passion inspired, not only me, but others to become part of Father’s Club.”

As noted earlier, Clay will be stepping away from the Chapter Chair position which he has held since Father’s Club inception. However, true to his character, he will continue to be in the middle of activity at Blue Valley West in the years to come.

We pay tribute to Clay Norkey, the 2024 Shovel Award winner!