Just show up.

By Jason Terry, Website and Blogging Lead for Father’s Club

For those of you that don’t know me, my name is Jason and I maintain the website and lead the blogging efforts for Father’s Club. I also attend the majority of the Father’s Club board meetings. As a result, I have a decent pulse on the conversations that are happening around the organization. One of the ongoing conversations is about fathers getting involved and staying involved.

There are so many ways for a father to get involved in Father’s Club… but there are also a lot of reasons men tell themselves that they are too busy, exhausted and not in the right mindset to show up for a Fist Bump event at their child’s school. At 6:50 am on a Friday morning. And they haven’t been getting enough sleep. And there is that important meeting at 9 am to prepare for… we all know the drill. Many of us have become masters at talking ourselves out of doing something we are being called to do. We feel a nudge, think it would be cool to get involved, and then think about all the other things we have going on, so maybe we will show up next time. In that moment, we also know that is probably wishful thinking.

I am writing this blog with a simple goal. I am hoping as you read this that you are already involved with Father’s Club. If not, I hope you decide to contact the Chapter Chair at the school your kid is going to and find out when the next event is happening. To make it easy for you, here is a link to the spreadsheet with contact information for the Chapter Chairs at every school where we have a presence.

This is your nudge. Get that event on your calendar and mentally commit to getting there. One time. Because that is all it will take.

This is one of those situations where it might be emotionally/mentally tough to commit to showing up… but once you get there it is AWESOME. I can tell you from personal experience that it really is awesome. Full disclosure, I am one of the few men involved in Father’s Club that is not an actual father. My wife and I decided not to have kids because we got married later in life… but we love being the “cool” aunt and uncle and we’re surrounded by kids through our extended family and socially.

Walking the Walk

I am incredibly busy with my work and personal life, just like you. But I am showing up for my nephew Will, a Freshman that goes to Olathe South. (I don’t think Uncle’s Club has the same ring to it as Father’s Club. :) I’ve made it to many of the Fist Bump events that happen on the last Friday of the month. (Brody Dorland is doing a fantastic job of organizing events for the Olathe South Father’s Club.) We show up in the middle of the school just before 7 am to grab signs, make sure everybody has Bluetooth speakers, make sure all the entrances will be covered and then we GO. Ten minutes later, the signs are up, a non-explicit Spotify playlist is jamming, and we’re ready to greet the kids with a big smile and a fist bump as they get to school.

It’s interesting to see the wide variety of reactions from the kids… some are confident and make good eye contact. Some are heads down trying to get by without being noticed (those are the ones I look for. They need to be seen.) Others might think it’s a little silly. And others tell me that they are always so glad to see us there and that it starts their day out right. Bottom line? Seeing the look on my nephew’s face when he gets out of the car and sees me is worth the effort a hundred times over.

There are so many more things I want to tell you about being involved in Father’s Club (relationships with other men, mental health support, giving back to the community, making a difference in your kid’s lives, and more.) But I don’t want this blog to be 3,000 words long.

If you made it this far, you get a virtual Fist Bump. [[FIST BUMP]] There, just punch the screen to make it happen.

Show up for yourself. Show up for your kids. Show up for your Community. Just show up.

Identify and reach out to your Chapter Chair to get started.