Remembering Vince Stephens: The Kind of Brother Every Man Needs

By Jeff Johnson, Director of Compliance/Board Secretary for Father’s Club

Remembering Vince Stephens: The Kind of Brother Every Man NeedsIt was a perfect July afternoon. I was just a dad at a high school freshman football game, grabbing water from the concession stand, when I overheard someone boldly quoting Scripture behind me: “Whoever drinks the water Jesus gives them will never thirst.” I turned around and said, “Amen! I like the way you think.” The man grinned and said, “Ahhh, I knew there was something different about you. How long have you been walking with Christ?”

I told him it had been about 15 years. He said, “I bet there’s a great story behind that. I’d love to hear it sometime.” As I started to leave, he called out again, “Wait! I see something special in you. Because of that, I want to invite you to a gathering with other dads. We’re calling it Father’s Club. Just a few of us dads, trying to step up.” We exchanged numbers, and he said, “I’m Vince… Vince Stephens. I’m so glad I met you.”

That day changed me. Not because of the meeting itself, but because Vince saw something in me that I didn’t even see. He affirmed me — as a man, as a follower of Christ, and as a father.  Men, how often do we speak words like that to each other? Vince’s words lifted me then, and they still do today.

 

Vince lived out bold, unapologetic faith.

Vince Stephens FamilyI remember hearing Vince belt out worship at church, off-key but full of joy. It wasn’t for show; it was for the Lord. His example still challenges me. I often sing off-key too, but now, I sing louder because I remember Vince.

Vince also taught me the small things matter. One time, I texted him, “God is with you, he will direct your path.” He gently replied, “Thank you, brother. But remember to always capitalize ‘He’ when you refer to God. He deserves the capital letter.” It was a simple correction, but it stuck with me. To this day, I always capitalize “He,” “Him,” and “Christ” when I speak of God — because Vince reminded me that God is worthy of even our smallest acts of reverence.

Vince and I discovered we had much in common — our sons were on the same teams, we went to the same church, and we both had a passion for raising godly families. But what truly bonded us was our shared love for Jesus.

We met often for coffee, lunch, Father’s Club meetings, and church huddles. Those times were precious. We didn’t just talk about sports or life’s surface-level topics — we talked about Jesus, about being husbands, dads, and men of faith. Vince shared openly about his struggles, his sins, and his love for his wife and kids. No masks.  No pretending. And I did the same. We became brothers. That’s what men need — other men who will tell the truth, who will challenge us to be better husbands, dads, and followers of Jesus.

Vince was not perfect — he’d be the first to admit it. In fact, part of what made him so impactful was that he never pretended to be. He was open about his flaws, his past, and his deep need for Jesus. Vince and I came from very different backgrounds. He grew up in the inner city with a difficult home life; I was raised in the suburbs by loving parents. According to the world’s logic, we shouldn’t have connected. But we knew the truth: What unites us in Christ is far greater than anything that could divide us.

Vince Stephens MemorialVince constantly pointed me — and everyone around him — toward Jesus. Vince spoke openly about his walk with Christ, his love for his wife, and his desire to raise his sons to be godly men. We challenged each other. We encouraged each other. And no matter what, we delighted in calling each other “brother.” Vince often told me, “I delight in my brother.” Vince had a lasting impact — not just on me but on every dad, every son, and every man he encountered.

Eternal Rewards

Vince’s life cannot be summed up fully in words. He lived for an eternal reward, not the applause of men. One of his favorite verses was, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” (Colossians 3:23-24)

Vince left a legacy. He challenged men to live boldly for Christ. I am a better man today because of Vince Stephens. He had a forever impact on me — not just as a friend, but as a brother. To Vince, I say: “Well done, brother. I will always delight in you.”

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California Trail Middle School Coffee Talks

By Steven Richmond, Chapter Co-Chair at California Trail Middle School for Father’s Club

California Trail Middle School Coffee TalksIt’s easy for dads to get caught up in the demands of work, family, and daily responsibilities. We often overlook the incredibly valuable practice of carving out small blocks of time to hit pause and meet with other dads living with the same demands to simply talk about life.

Meeting up at the local sports bar for an appetizer and a beverage is enjoyable, but the TVs and atmosphere can be distracting and take away from deeper, intentional conversation. Plus, between rushing home after work in time for dinner, kids’ sporting practices and events, nights can just be chaotic!

In January of this year, a group of six dads from California Trail Father’s Club began meeting every other week, in the morning at RevoCup Coffee, from 6:30 am to 8:30 am. Dads stop by before work or after dropping the kids off at school; and arrive and depart as their schedule permits. Since starting we have had more dads join us as we have learned the simple routine of grabbing a cup of coffee and spending time with other dads has helped enrich our mental wellbeing, personal growth, and family life.

Creating a Support Network

Fatherhood can feel isolated at times. Many dads find themselves navigating the challenges of parenting without a clear support system, especially when the demands of their career or personal life leave little room for connection. Meeting other dads regularly creates a powerful support network, where we can share experiences, frustrations, and triumphs. Just knowing other dads are walking a similar path and that we are not alone in the fatherhood journey is a huge boost.

Sure, we can talk about sports, but we have found most conversation in a more relaxed setting prompts dads to discuss common challenges like balancing work and home life, managing teenage independence, or simply trying to maintain a healthy relationship with our spouse. Having a group of dads who understand the nuances of fatherhood can make it easier to work through these hurdles.

Encouraging Mental and Emotional Well-Being

Society often places an emphasis on the idea that dads need to be stoic, strong, and unshakable. However, this can take a toll on mental wellbeing. Bottling up emotions or neglecting to talk about personal struggles can lead to stress, burnout, and even depression. When dads burn out, we risk becoming too passive or unengaged with our families. We must remember it’s OK to not be OK.

Coffee Talk provides an easy and welcoming space for dads to express their thoughts, process stress and frustrations, and feelings in a non-judgmental, open environment. Sharing the challenges we face in our day to day lives with a group of dads who “get it” help normalize discussions around mental and emotional well-being, something that is often neglected in conversations about fatherhood.

Learning from One Another

California Trail Middle School Coffee TalksEach dad brings his own unique perspective and experiences to the table. Every dad has valuable lessons to share. These biweekly Coffee Talks provide an opportunity for dads to exchange parenting tips, life hacks, and advice based on their own trials and successes.

Perhaps one dad has found a creative way to manage time more effectively, while another has discovered strategies to communicate better with their kids. Learning from one another can help us dads feel more confident in our parenting abilities and provide fresh ideas for tackling life’s challenges.

Modeling Healthy Social Habits for Our Children

Our children are always watching us, and they learn by example. When they see us dads actively participating in healthy social practices—such as nurturing friendships, being open about feelings, and supporting one another—they absorb these behaviors. These Coffee Talks may help teach our children that it’s okay to lean on others for support and to engage in meaningful conversations about life.

Moreover, these social gatherings can help break the stereotype that men are solitary figures who don’t need to connect with others. By modeling positive social behaviors, dads can help pave the way for our children to prioritize relationships and communication throughout their lives.

Building Stronger Marriages and Family Lives

While the focus of these Coffee Talks is primarily on the dads themselves, the benefits extend to our marriages and family dynamics. Having a space to talk openly can help dads be more present and engaged at home. Sharing parenting tips and discussing relationship issues allows fathers to return to their families with a clearer sense of purpose, renewed energy, and fresh insights.

Additionally, when dads feel supported and understood in their personal lives, they are more likely to be emotionally available and present for their spouses and families. A happier, well-balanced father is better equipped to be an involved and loving husband and dad.

Time for Reflection and Personal Growth

The act of regularly stepping away from everyday responsibilities to reflect on one’s life is essential for personal growth. These biweekly Coffee Talks offer us dads the space to pause, reflect, and reassess our goals and priorities. Whether discussing career shifts, personal ambitions, or our evolving role as fathers, these conversations often help provide clarity and insight. Whether we are working on patience, self-care, or improving our relationships. These regular meetings allow us to track progress and hold ourselves accountable.

It’s Fun!

Let’s not forget the sheer joy of spending time with others who share similar interests and experiences. Coffee shop meetings offer a laid-back atmosphere, where dads can relax, enjoy a good cup of coffee, and talk about everything from the latest sports games to funny family anecdotes. These meetings don’t have to be all serious; they can also be a much-needed break from the hustle and bustle of life.

It’s More Than Just Coffee

Meeting every other week at a coffee shop is more than just a casual hangout—it’s an opportunity to build lasting friendships, grow personally, and enrich family life. Dads often feel pressure to juggle many roles. Consistent, routine meetups offer much-needed support and camaraderie. Whether it’s sharing parenting advice, talking about day-to-day stresses, or simply enjoying a cup of coffee, these gatherings serve as a powerful reminder that fatherhood, just like life itself, is better when shared.

Be intentional, reach out to other dads, invite them to meet individually or as a group for coffee. You might just find that a little time spent chatting over coffee can lead to lasting friendships and benefits for others, you, and your family.

  • To get involved with a Father’s Club chapter at your school, visit the Chapters page on our website.
  • If there isn’t a chapter currently at your school and you would like to know more about starting a Father’s Club chapter, visit the Contact page and fill out the form with your details and we will be in touch!
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Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community Impact

By Brody Dorland, Chapter Co-Chair at Olathe South for Father’s Club

Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community ImpactThis Valentine’s Day, Father’s Club chapters from Olathe South High School and Olathe East High School teamed up for our 2nd Annual Father’s Club Face-Off event. What started as a simple idea for a basketball shoot-out between chapters a few years ago, has turned into an unforgettable night filled with teamwork, student engagement, and a little last-minute heroism.

The Power of Teamwork

Events like these don’t happen without a team willing to put in the effort behind the scenes. From finding former basketball stars who can still sling the rock, to managing logistics, every detail was carefully planned. It took a coordinated effort to recruit volunteers, organize pizza delivery, set up the gym, and rally the hype squad to ensure everything ran smoothly.

One of the night’s biggest challenges came at the last minute when our pizza delivery fell through due to a mix-up with DoorDash. Despite multiple confirmations with Papa Johns, our pizza never arrived. With only 15 minutes before the Face-Off, a few of our dads jumped into action, racing to pick up 70 pizzas themselves. Their quick thinking saved the night, ensuring that students still got their well-earned pizza celebration after the event!

Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community Impact Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community Impact Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community Impact

Fun, Laughter, and a Surprise Treat

If there’s one thing high school students love, it’s seeing their dads step up in the name of fun.

The Face-Off had basketball dads from both Olathe South and Olathe East competing in a friendly but intense skills competition. With the crowd hyped up by our PA announcer, students erupted in cheers as their dads took on layups, free throws, three-pointers, and even half-court shots in a quest for bragging rights.

Of course, the best part? Everyone was a winner when the pizza arrived. Whether their dads took home the victory or not, the students were just excited to get a surprise snack during an exciting, back-and-forth varsity basketball game.

Father’s Club Face-Off: Teamwork, Fun, and Community Impact

Strengthening Our School Community

Beyond the fun and competition, events like Father’s Club Face-Off serve a deeper purpose. They bring together parents, students, and staff to foster stronger connections and a sense of community within the school. Seeing dads actively involved in school events sends a powerful message to students—that their community supports them, values their experiences, and is willing to go the extra mile (literally, in this case!) to make their school experience memorable.

A huge thank you to all the volunteers, OS and OE basketball dads, our school admin, and especially the dads who made the last-minute pizza run. Without your teamwork and dedication, this event wouldn’t have been possible.

We can’t wait for the next year’s Face-Off event—stay tuned, and if you haven’t joined us yet, now’s the time!

  • To get involved with a Father’s Club chapter at your school, visit the Chapters page on our website.
  • If there isn’t a chapter currently at your school and you would like to know more about starting a Father’s Club chapter, visit the Contact page and fill out the form with your details and we will be in touch!

 

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16th Annual Mission Cup Golf Tournament – Save the Dates!

By Randy Bratton, Mission Cup Golf Committee Lead / Board Vice President for Father’s Club

Father’s Club is proud to announce the details for the 16th annual Mission Cup Golf Tournament. This is our biggest fundraiser of the year, and once again we will be playing on two golf courses on two different days, making it one of the most unique events each year in Kansas City!

Monday, September 22nd, 2025 – Prairie Highlands
Friday, October 17th, 2025 – Sycamore Ridge

We have scheduled rounds on a Monday and a Friday, and about one month apart, so that our players and sponsors will have an opportunity to participate at one or both courses.

On Monday, September 22 we will play for the first time at beautiful Prairie Highlands Golf Club in Olathe. Shotgun start will be at 10 am.

Then on Friday October 17, we will return for the third time to Sycamore Ridge Golf Club in Spring Hill, KS with a shotgun start at 8 am.

So why do we present this tournament every year?

16th Annual Mission Cup 2025 - Save the Date!Our mission is simple. Father’s Club is a dad-led, grassroots effort creating simple ways for dads to be intentional with their KIDS, with other DADS and within their COMMUNITY. With resolve, humility, and love, our mission is to be a catalyst for positive influence around the world.

Since 2018, Father’s Club has seen tremendous growth in metro Kansas City, with dozens of chapters in middle schools and high schools. Despite their busy schedules, these chapters are led by every-day-dads, who generously give of their time in the interest of building a stronger community, and being intentional about spending time with their kids.

Our kids are facing huge challenges these days. As Dads, they need us to step in the gap and lead. Easier said than done, but we have seen the difference Father’s Club has made in rallying Dads to the cause. Our impact is visible, the stories are emotional, and the needs are very real.

  • If you have an interest in being a corporate sponsor, or putting together a team for one or both rounds, reach out to Randy Bratton at randy.bratton@fathersclub.org.
  • You can learn more about Father’s Club by visiting fathersclub.org.
  • Up to date information about the Mission Cup can always be found at fathersclub.org/golf.
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Father’s Club at Blue Valley West is Firing on All Cylinders!

By Charles Dahm, Blue Valley Schools Regional Chair for Father’s Club

Father's Club at Blue Valley West is Firing On All Cylinders!When Blue Valley West (BVW) Father’s Club first formed in 2018, you can be sure nobody knew just how big and impactful it would become. This group of dads shows up and shows out for BVW students and teachers. Their commitment and sheer volume of support is inspirational.

As co-founders Clay Norkey and Grady Hawley were finding their way in the early days, BVW Principal, Dr. Brett Potts, came to them with an opportunity… Football concessions.

Football Concessions

When asked how he responded to that opportunity, Clay said, “I replied, ‘ABSOLUTELY!’ Even though we had no idea how much work was actually involved. We were just excited to have Father’s Club step up to help the school, especially being at the heart of one of the biggest extracurricular activities on campus. The prospect of being in place with the opening of the second District Activity Complex on BVW’s campus added to the excitement.”

They had no idea how that opportunity would transform their small club into an integral part of the BVW culture. They introduced the 4th Quarter Hot Dog Toss — tossing and launching Glizzies and candy to the student section — which has now become a tradition at BV West games, complete with a PA system announcement and coordination with the cheerleaders and dance team! They learned from both successes and mistakes, transforming hard work and commitment into a valuable fundraising opportunity that fuels their entrepreneurial spirit.

BVW Clubs and Organizations Team Up

The tradition continues at BVW where clubs and organizations can team up to help share in the work (and the profits) under the Friday night lights. Clay proudly says, “100% of profits are invested directly into the students, staff, and school, with none being used for dads-only activities. The chapter works hard for tips and other fundraising to fund those events.”

This chapter boasts an impressive number of dads who are ready rock in the 2nd semester of an already amazing year. “We have 40 or more dads we can count on to show up throughout the year,” says current chairman Kevin Saylan. He went on, “A successful school year starts long before the first day of school. It starts in the summer months when we meet up with Principal Dr Bonnema to discuss the year and identify opportunities for engagement.” Then he and vice-chair Dan Vial run a kick-off meeting in the BVW Commons to regroup, meet new members, identify project leaders and layout plans for the school year. Their leadership team contains 10 (soon to be more) dads who are ready to develop and implement their plans.

Father's Club at Blue Valley West is Firing on All Cylinders!

Here’s a look at just some of the great accomplishments this school year:

  • Football concessions
  • Senior sunrise with breakfast
  • Jaguar Grill
  • Homecoming dance support
  • “Just show up” at sports
  • “Semi-quasi, mandatory” meet and greets for dads
  • New Jaguar Night for incoming students
  • Teacher appreciation

Upcoming events:

  • Mental Health and Suicide Awareness Training
  • Sweetheart Dance Support
  • Employment and career planning counseling
  • Halftime basketball shootout vs. Blue Valley High dads
  • And of course, FISTBUMPS FOR FOOD!

The simple act of a high five, a “have a great day,” and handing over some food creates memories and a spirit of welcome for dads and students. After such an event, one BVW dad said, “I’m not sure who these events are for, because that really energized ME for the day.” Likewise, students are often moved by these intentional acts of kindness. One student said, “I woke up late and was having a bad morning and you guys turned it upside down and made my day!”

Father's Club at Blue Valley West is Firing on All Cylinders!

Support for Mental Health

Nowhere is their commitment to students, teachers, and one another more apparent than through their support for mental health.

Over two dozen dads have completed mental health and suicide awareness training. Signage and t-shirts at all Father’s Club events remind students, “Right Here, Right Now, You Matter.” The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline which anyone can call, text, or chat is also prominently displayed at every event.

Father's Club at Blue Valley West is Firing on All Cylinders!This May, for the third straight year, the chapter will provide at least 5 mental health scholarships for graduating seniors. The scholarship program provides financial support and recognition to students who have: A) endured and persevered through their own mental-health struggles and are willing to share those experiences to help others, and/or B) have made significant contributions toward improving mental health for others, reduced stigmas associated with mental-health issues or raised awareness of mental-health issues in their community.

Dan Viall, mental health lead, says, “Our kids are dealing with very different things than when we were growing up, and reading dozens of scholarship essays every year is both revealing, sobering, and at times heartbreaking. And yet, I’m also inspired and encouraged by the resilience and advocacy so many have demonstrated, especially to encourage their own peers. These stories of perseverance and courage inspire others and help fellow students through hard times. We’re grateful we are able to play a small part as dads, encouraging them along their journey.”

Congratulations to the dads at BV West who “just showed up” and are finding community together, as they connect with each other, their kids, and their school.  If it’s been a while since you’ve come out to an event at your school, make the next one a priority!

  • To get involved with a Father’s Club chapter at your school, visit the Chapters page on our website.
  • If there isn’t a chapter currently at your school and you would like to know more about starting a Father’s Club chapter, visit the Contact page and fill out the form with your details and we will be in touch!
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Valentine’s Day – Modeling love, respect, and partnership with your spouse and children.

By Mike Davisson, Executive Director/Olathe Regional Director for Father’s Club

Valentine's DayValentine’s Day is more than just a celebration of romantic love; it’s an opportunity for a husband to show his wife how much she means to him and to set an example for his children about how a man should treat a woman in a marriage. The way a man chooses to honor his wife on this special day not only strengthens his relationship with her but also lays the groundwork for teaching his children about love, respect, and partnership.

Here’s how a husband can show up for his wife and why this is such a critical teaching moment.

1. Plan Thoughtfully

The first step in creating a meaningful Valentine’s Day experience is thoughtful planning.

The effort a man puts into planning shows his wife that he values her and their relationship. This doesn’t necessarily mean an extravagant gesture—even simple plans can have a profound impact if they are made with intention.

For example, a husband might:

  • Arrange for a babysitter so the two can enjoy a quiet dinner together.
  • Prepare a home-cooked meal with her favorite dishes.
  • Write her a heartfelt letter or card expressing gratitude and love.

When children observe this level of intentionality, they learn that thoughtfulness and effort are key elements of a loving relationship. They see that love isn’t just about words but about actions that reflect care and consideration.

2. Express Genuine Appreciation

Valentine’s Day is an excellent opportunity to express gratitude.

A husband should take the time to tell his wife how much he appreciates her—not just for what she does but for who she is. Whether through words, gifts, or acts of service, showing appreciation reinforces the bond between partners.

Imagine a father sitting his children down and saying, “I’m taking your mom out tonight because she’s so special to me. She works hard for our family, and I want to show her how much she means to us.” This kind of modeling teaches a daughter that she should expect appreciation and respect in her future relationships and models to a son how he should treat his future wife.

3. Prioritize Her Needs and Preferences

A husband should make the day about his wife’s preferences and desires.

What would make her feel loved and cherished? Maybe she loves flowers and chocolates, or perhaps she prefers experiences over material gifts. Listening to her needs and prioritizing her happiness shows selflessness and respect.

When children see their father going out of his way to prioritize their mother’s happiness, they learn the importance of empathy and attentiveness in a relationship. They grow up understanding that a good partner takes the time to understand and honor the needs of the other person.

4. Celebrate the Everyday Moments

Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be the only day a husband shows love and appreciation, but it can be a day to celebrate the small, everyday moments that make their relationship special. A man can reflect on and highlight these moments, reminding his wife of the joy and connection they share.

For instance, he could create a photo album of their favorite memories or write a list of “10 Things I Love About You.” These gestures emphasize the importance of cherishing the mundane as much as the extraordinary.

By demonstrating this attitude, a father sets an example for his children to appreciate the little things in life and to seek a partner who does the same.

5. Model Healthy Communication

Valentine’s Day can also be an opportunity to model healthy communication.

A husband might use the occasion to have an open and loving conversation about their relationship, discussing hopes, dreams, and ways to continue growing together.

When children witness their parents communicating openly and lovingly, they learn how to express their feelings and resolve conflicts in their own relationships. This is a vital skill that will serve them well in her future.

6. Show Respect and Teamwork

One of the most profound ways a man can honor his wife is by treating her as an equal partner.

This might mean sharing responsibilities at home or consulting her about plans for the day. Acts of respect and teamwork are essential in any marriage and demonstrating them on Valentine’s Day reinforces their importance.

Kids who see their parents working together as a team will internalize the value of partnership. They’ll understand that a healthy relationship is built on mutual respect and shared effort.

7. Demonstrate Affection

Affection—whether through words, physical touch, or small acts of kindness—is an important part of any marriage.

On Valentine’s Day, a husband can make an extra effort to be affectionate, whether it’s by holding his wife’s hand, giving her a hug, or simply telling her, “I love you.”

When children observe this loving behavior, they learn that affection is a natural and healthy part of a marriage. They will grow up expecting and valuing warmth and kindness from their future partner.

8. Involve the Family

While Valentine’s Day is traditionally about couples, involving the whole family can make it even more special.

A husband could:

  • Have his children help prepare a surprise for their mom.
  • Share stories about how he and his wife met and fell in love.
  • Include a family activity, like making Valentine’s crafts together.

By including the family, a man not only makes his wife feel loved but also teaches his children—especially his daughter—about the importance of celebrating love and togetherness.

9. Be Consistent Year-Round

While Valentine’s Day is a wonderful occasion to make grand gestures, the most impactful way to show up for a wife is through consistent love and respect all year. A single day of attention won’t mean much if it isn’t backed by daily acts of kindness and support.

Consistency teaches a daughter that love is not just about fleeting moments but about a steady, unwavering commitment. She’ll see that a healthy marriage is built on a foundation of reliability and trust.

The Long-Term Impact on a Daughter

When a man treats his wife with love and respect, especially on days like Valentine’s Day, he’s not just strengthening his marriage—he’s also shaping his children’s understanding of relationships. They learn to recognize the qualities of a good partner: kindness, thoughtfulness, respect, and empathy. They grow up with a clear picture of how partners deserve to be treated and what a healthy, loving relationship looks like.

Young women are often exposed to unhealthy relationship dynamics in media and society. A father’s example is a powerful counterbalance. By showing up for his wife, a man helps his daughter set high standards for her own relationships, ensuring she seeks out a partner who will treat her with the same love and respect.

Again, Valentine’s Day is more than just a celebration of romantic love; it’s an opportunity to model what a healthy, loving relationship looks like. When a husband shows up for his wife with thoughtfulness, appreciation, and respect, he strengthens their bond and sets a powerful example for his children.

Father’s Club is not about being perfect but about showing up with intentionality.  So be sure to show up for your wife for Valentine’s Day and model a loving relationship for your children!

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Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away.

By Jim Bradford, Chapter Co-Chair at Mission Trail Middle School for Father’s Club

Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away.Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away. A small window of time to make a connection can prove to be the catalyst you need to help a student (their child), even though you’ve never even met them. Huh? Well, let me explain.

A couple of weeks ago, another father and I had an opportunity to talk to some parents at a Mission Trail Middle School 6th Grade Enrollment Night. They were coming to learn about the enrollment process at the middle school level. Heads were spinning, minds were racing and many were coming to grips with the fact that their babies were going to be in – GULP – middle school next year. But we also knew this would be an important opportunity to start getting Father’s Club on their radars.

We didn’t have much time to engage with the parents that were coming to the meeting, so it was imperative we caught them quickly with something that would grab their attention. We gave them a Father’s Club handout with a brief description of what we’re about and included a QR code for more information.

We also shared the analogy that Father’s Club is a bit like Watch D.O.G.S. at the middle school level. While both Father’s Club and Watch D.O.G.S. are two completely separate organizations with different missions, it was a perfect way to start a conversation. Dads want to be a part of their children’s lives. Watch D.O.G.S. was a perfect way to engage within the school building and now, letting them know where’s a similar option at the middle school level DID get their attention.

We heard time and time again, “Oh, wow, yeah, I’ll check it out!”

Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away. Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away.

Dads often want to stay involved with their kids and Father’s Club is a great option. It’s just a matter of taking advantage of an opportunity to let them know about it.

While they are different, both organizations are vitally important. Watch D.O.G.S. offers dads a chance to interact with their child’s class, help out at lunch and engage with students all over the building for a day.

Father’s Club is a variation on that theme, except it’s not about a one-and-done type of situation. An engaged Father’s Club allows dads to be intentionally part of the educational experience, whether it’s for 10 minutes or three hours.

For Father’s Club to survive, thrive and do a deep dive, we need to make sure we don’t miss these chances to connect. If we don’t connect with future Father’s Club dads, we’ll never have a chance to connect with a student that might need us most. It may not be the one we think needs help. It may not be the one we see every time we’re out there doing Fist Bumps for Food. But we know they’re out there and we’re here to connect with them. Somehow.

Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away. Never let a chance to connect with a parent slip away.

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Raymore-Peculiar East Middle School: Presence Vs. Presents

By Loren Jones, Chapter Chair at Raymore-Peculiar East Middle School for Father’s Club

Raymore-Peculiar East Middle School: Presence Vs. PresentsSometimes as a father, it can be challenging to see our value outside of being financial providers. In a digital world that’s constantly vying for our attention, giving ourselves the opportunity to be present in the moment is crucial to how our kids and communities see us. In fact, studies show a direct impact on kids’ self esteem, risk taking, and cognitive thinking.

Throughout almost every studied culture, the three main factors of fatherhood include: Protection, Providing, and Discipline. It’s time to add a 4th: Presence.

I have to admit… it seems unfair that moms seem to be expected to show up for everything. But when dads show up, it’s like the stars aligned for the day. But stop and think about that for a minute. When dad showed up, everything was “perfect”. As fathers, why shouldn’t we want things to be“perfect” more? This just goes to show you that kids prefer our presence not our presents.

Unfortunately, most men don’t make money off of our good looks.

Raymore-Peculiar East Middle School: Presence Vs. PresentsWe have to go out into the workforce and provide for our families. And we have to trust  that our families will understand that. But the nurturing side of us is equally as important. Being active and attentive has so many positive effects. In addition, being attentive also minimizes the negative things our kids may experience during their adolescent years. This includes substance abuse, teen pregnancy, and trouble with the law amongst other negative behaviors. Our attentiveness adds value to their education and other positive extracurricular activities our kids participate in.

So the next time you think, “Oh, I’ll stay at work another hour and make a little more money”, pause and make sure that’s the right sacrifice. Get involved in your kids’ lives and ask questions about how they’re doing. Get involved with Father’s Club at your school (or start a chapter if there isn’t one!) Seeing just one kid’s face light up because you showed up and gave them a moment of your time is worth every second.

To get involved with a Father’s Club chapter at your school, visit the Chapters page on our website. If there isn’t a chapter currently at your school and you would like to know more about starting a Father’s Club chapter, visit the Contact page and fill out the form with your details and we will be in touch!

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Five Blue Valley Schools, One Family – That’s a wrap on fall sports!

By Charles Dahm, Blue Valley Schools Regional Chair for Father’s Club

Five Blue Valley Schools, One Family - That’s a wrap on fall sports!All five Blue Valley (BV) School district Father’s Club chapters had a great fall sport season. These chapters supported students and teachers by showing up and making things happen. Fathers were everywhere, actively participating, and had a great time doing it.

Blue Valley Southwest

Blue Valley Southwest Chapter Chairs Dan Paschke and Andrew Kneisler led what must be a PERFECT activity for dads – FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! The BVSW pep rally and bonfire on homecoming week have become a fun tradition with food, games and memorable performances by marching band, dance, and cheer. And what pep rally is complete without a big ol’ fire?!  These dads in cooperation with administrators and the Overland Park Fire Department Fire Station 48 (conveniently located on the BVSW Campus) made memories for these students for years to come. Combined with parade support, grilling at home football games, tailgates and plenty of hotdogs flying into the student section, these guys brought it this fall.

BVSW tailgate BVSW burgers

BVSW fire BVSW fire

Blue Valley Northwest

Blue Valley Northwest is rebuilding their role and rebooting their passion for helping the school, the students, and each other.  Along with Principal Vomhof, the new chapter chair Johnny Johnson re-launched the chapter and then launched some food —  into the student section – hotdogs, fruit snacks, and best (or worst, I suppose) of all – Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies.  The marching band got in on the fun early in the 3rd quarter.   BVNW is set up for success this year with great support from Johnny, Mrs. Vomhof and their amazing Booster Club.

Blue Valley Northwest Blue Valley Northwest Blue Valley Northwest

Blue Valley West

Blue Valley West is among the most active chapters in all of Father’s Club.  Their leadership with fall football concessions is the fuel that drives their philanthropic spirit.  Their fundraising contributes so much to BVW – including scholarships for seniors.  This year these guys, led by Kevin Saylan and Dan Viall, supported 9 football games including middle school, freshman, and JV games. Their concessions model also involves local clubs, teams, and organizations to help share in the fun and earn some cash too.  Congratulations gentleman on a fall sports season to remember.

Blue Valley West Blue Valley West

Blue Valley West Blue Valley West

Blue Valley North

The Blue Valley North Father’s Club has found a few exciting and novel ways to earn some cash at fall sports – pickles and cotton candy!  When you walk into a football game at BVN you’re greeted by Todd Welholter and Chris Whigman … and their inflatable pickles …along with the irresistible smell of freshly made cotton candy.  Who knew that giant pickles on a stick and even pickle juice would be such a big hit?  Hot days early in the year helped with sales.   Even more unexpected is the demand for INFLATABLE pickles.  The students begged them to sell those inflatable pickles – so of course they obliged, and the students walked off with one of their own.  A few students even got in on the marketing and walked the stands holding inflatable pickles and pickle signs.  Nicely done gentlemen.

Blue Valley North Blue Valley North Blue Valley North

Blue Valley High School

Blue Valley High School is THE OG when it comes to Father’s Club Chapters. From a few guys on a deck a few years ago to 35 chapters today!   Their chapter remains a vibrant and integral part of the fabric at BVH and they showed up in force at fall sports this year.  They turned out bigtime to support Homecoming as the bonfire pit bosses, along with supporting the parade.  They also lent their grilling expertise to tailgates for football, soccer, volleyball, teacher appreciation, and even orchestra and yearbook! Cory Reinert and Shaun Reid along with their social media guru, Phil Hazel, led the way and the students appreciated it!  Follow these guys on Twitter (@BVHSFathers) to be inspired by their focus, values, and sheer output.

Blue Valley High School Blue Valley High School Blue Valley High School

To get involved with a Father’s Club chapter at your school, visit the Chapters page on our website.

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Lee’s Summit West Father’s Club Chapter Wins Volunteer of the Year Award

Lee's Summit West Father's Club Chapter Wins Volunteer of the Year Award

Recognition ceremony at the Lee’s Summit School Board Meeting- Father’s Club members left to right: Roger Weller, Craig Nash, Tim Ginnings, Tyler Thompson, Cartus Rogers, Bill Reinwald

By Tim Ginnings, Chapter Co-Chair at Lee’s Summit West for Father’s Club

In the fall of 2024, the Lee’s Summit West (LSW) High School Father’s Club chapter was recognized by Dr. Kayla Maid, LSW principal, as the school’s 2024-2025 Volunteer of the Year. Dr. Maid highlighted her appreciation for Father’s Club “going above and beyond to be intentional about being in our schools.” She also cited our willingness to help anywhere needed and our “can-do” attitude.

Lee's Summit West Father's Club Chapter Wins Volunteer of the Year Award

Senior Sunrise Breakfast – flipping pancakes and rocking to tunes

Some highlights from the past few months are below:

  • The Lee’s Summit West Father’s Club has partnered with the Student Senate to host both a Senior Sunrise and a Senior Sunset event the last two years. Father’s Club provides food, entertainment, and encouragement.
  • In each of the past three years, the LSW Father’s Club has partnered with Neighborhood Cafe, a local business, to hand out individually wrapped cinnamon rolls for the first Fist Bumps for Food of the year.
  • The LSW Father’s Club donates time, labor, and resources toward events and projects on the LSW campus. One such project this year was repairing the tables and benches in the outdoor common area.
Lee's Summit West Father's Club Chapter Wins Volunteer of the Year Award

Cinnamon Roll Fist Bump Day

 

Lee's Summit West Father's Club Chapter Wins Volunteer of the Year Award

Repairing Benches in the school’s outdoor common area

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